Seventy-one, But I’m Still Not Done, LEARNING!

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My favorite activities in life are thinking (learning) and laughing. Matter of fact, in recent years it has been found that a “sense of humor” is a sign of higher intelligence. This would apply to all those comedians who write their own materials for standup gigs, not late night hosts who have a team of political propagandists as their TDS biased “joke” writers.

So if you want to remain relevant in this world you have to be willing to adapt to change. I used to impress this life lesson to my students with posters on my classroom walls:

“The measure of intelligence is the ability to change.” – Albert Einstein

“It is not the strongest of the species that survives, nor the most intelligent, but the one most responsive to change.” – Charles Darwin

A Gen-Z Story Example

A year ago I had to go in the hospital for a surgery just as I have had to do the two previous years. Since my mother was a Registered Nurse (RN) and my father a fireman/paramedic, I have great understanding, empathy, and appreciation for all those in the medical fields and what they do for us. I then recalled two recent events of my past that I calculated would be a pretty good setup for a hilarious joke in the hospital. I figured this would help me pass the time and alleviate my boredom while lightening up the day of those caring for me.

  • First, I recalled my father’s funeral when several visitors commented how young he looked and they could not believe he was 84 when he passed. They said he must have had the “young genes”. I laughed (never having heard of the expression before) but agreed and then they asked me how old I was. After I told them they said, “You have your father’s young genes, too!”
  • Second, I recalled how so many of my hospital caretakers of the past seemingly were all of Gen-Z, the generation born between 1997 and 2012 or essentially 20-somethings. Since I knew this I also knew Gen-Z has their own rather sophisticated “slanguage”, far more so than any previous generations.

I decided to play a game when I got out of surgery and booked into my hospital room. When my caretakers (CNAs, LPNs, RNs, PTs, and lab techs) came into my room, I would use my hands to frame my face like a high fashion model and say, “Kids, I have a game I want you to play with me today: How old do you think I am? And there is no penalty for guessing too high or too low so you absolutely cannot lose this game.”

They would all get their guesses in which always ranged from less than my age to ridiculously less (68 to 49). And then I had a ready-made answer for them in Gen Z lingo:

“Seventy-one! As a retired professor I was getting kind of cheugy but then I switched up and became sure fire riz and bussin.”

Translation:

“Seventy-one! As a retired professor I was getting kind of outdated but then I did a makeover and became totally flirtatious and desirable.”

The laughter and smiles I got made my day! The one that got me laughing hardest instantly was a girl who cut herself off as she said, “Get the f… out of here!” (I was in a Catholic hospital where we all try not to use profanity. She cut herself off just after the “F” of the incoming F-bomb.)

One of the most memorable responses was a young cute blonde girl (CNA or LPN) who had guessed my age at only 49. After I delivered my punchline and all the others in the room (about 4) were laughing hysterically we noticed she was not and I asked her why.

She said, “What’s that mean?”

That caused all of us to laugh even harder… I was actually crying.

The others said, “We will explain it to you out in the hall.”

I later made them and a male orderly laugh again when I mumbled in my bed, “Man, if I wasn’t happily married like my wife always reminds me I am, I would totally want to get up wit dat little blonde who guessed I was only 49. When I was younger, she was my type, blonde and clueless.”

So the ones taking care of me wanted to know, “How do you know our Gen-Z slang at 71?”

I confessed to them I cheated and used an online translator. They, again, thought that was hilarious, brilliant, but also hilarious. They had no idea anything like that existed and promised they would start using it themselves.

AI Story Examples

In my last article I wrote about what transpired at a Coldplay concert of last week which blew up the internet like nothing I have ever seen before.

While partisan Democrats wanted us to be focused on the belief that President Trump has been with Epstein’s underage minor girls, and partisan Republicans want us to be focused on the apparent actual treason committed by former President Barack Obama sabotaging President Donald Trump’s first presidential term, Coldplay gave us all a “SQUIREL!” moment.

“Coldplay Concert Offers Us Garden of Eden Moment” – The Thinking Conservative

What followed on social media platforms were all kinds of snide comments, but more interestingly, some people superimposed into the Coldplay kiss cam image people they would like to see, such as Bill Clinton and Monica Lewinsky, as one good example. Me being me, I was like “How did they do that?!”

It only took me about 30 minutes and the use of a free-use online Artificial Intelligence website and I had made my first AI generated meme advancing my idea of humor as pictured below.

Biden-Harris Coldplay Meme
Biden-Harris Coldplay Meme (AI Generated Image by Mark Schwendau)

CONCLUSION:

Like I always say, I like to think and I like to laugh. I proudly shared my new creation with my wife who told me, “You need to get a life!”

Sometimes I wish my wife was more like my mother. I could bring all kinds of crap home from school and say, “Look what I did in school today, Mommy!” She would always find a way to sugarcoat it, no matter how awful it truly was.

Something I have never done before but will do so now, A CORRECTION:

We may have inadvertently reported the marital status wrong of the Astronomer Corporation HR director Kristin Cabot in our last article. We have found different sources that seemingly conflict as to whether she is married or divorced and, if still married, the name of her husband. We suspect some of our aggregate news sources we use may have confused a different Kristin Cabot with the one at the Coldplay concert. We regret this error.

No matter the marital status, our regrets go to the families involved as infidelity and divorce is very painful and traumatic. As a teacher of our youth for 40+ years, my heart always aches for our youth living through the divorce of broken homes.

And to all the liberals who hate me for attacking their side, I would just offer this defense: My mind would have never have thought of this meme had I not seen this first.

“Moment Jill Biden kisses Kamala Harris’ husband on the lips | State of the Union address” – The Telegraph

So, yes, it is still your fault!

© 2025 by Mark S. Schwendau

Mark Schwendau
Mark Schwendauhttps://www.idrawiwrite.tech/
If there is a "CONSPIRACY" THEORY Mark Schwendau won't miss out telling you about it. He is a retired college technology educator and author in Illinois. He holds a BS degree in technology education and a MS degree in industrial management. He has had news articles published in online news journals such as Communities Digital News and Independent Sentinel. His opinions are his own as assured by the First Amendment of the Constitution.

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