A Brave New Maxim For a Brave New World

5Mind. The Meme Platform

“What country before ever existed a century and half without a rebellion? And what country can preserve its liberties if their rulers are not warned from time to time that their people preserve the spirit of resistance
What signify a few lives lost in a century or two? The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants. It is its natural manure.”
-Thomas Jefferson

Against the backdrop of the recent lawfare scam perpetrated by the state against the leading oppositional presidential candidate — the stuff of banana republics, America now being reduced to in essence a Third World nation — this gem from The Smut Peddlers, albeit not eloquent enough for the Founders’ well-bred tastes, seems more apropos than ever.

The crass lyrics about smoking in no-smoking zones and refusing to wear a helmet in defiance of local laws because they’re for communist fags — entertaining if lacking in profundity — essentially boil down to the titular message: “Because F**k You, That’s Why.”

At some point — now that the rulemakers have essentially conceded their rules are arbitrary and maliciously enforced based on political considerations — the time has passed for rational debate.

Had we adopted The Smut Peddlers philosophy in 2020, for instance, when we were being henpecked to mask our faces in a worldwide quasi-religious BDSM ritual completely devoid of any practical prophylactic value, things may have gone very differently. Silent acquiescence served as affirmative consent, so they pushed it to the limit just to see what they could get away with.

And, God knows, get away with a lot they did in the name of Public Health™.

Have we learned anything?

When your six-year-old’s public school guidance counselor demands to know why he won’t register his preferred pronouns with the government, you could painstakingly explain that you are teaching him to subscribe to reality-based biology, for example that X and Y chromosomes exist and little boys have wee-wees and little girls have vee-vees like she (the green-haired guidance counselor with a doctorate in Navajo Diaspora Studies) is the six-year-old in the situation — a conversation that could take hours and would likely result in your referral to the FBI for domestic terrorism anyway no matter how civil or rational.

Or you could cut to the chase…

“Because f**k you, that’s why”

Enough with the religious exemptions and proofs of natural immunity!

How to best respond when the manager asks “Why, submissive Techno-Serf #693582094, won’t you allow our Thank God It’s Friday™ hostess to scan your forehead implant to ensure you’re up to date on your vaccinations pursuant to Health Code 666 before you can be seated?”

“Because f**k you, that’s why”

And f**k Thank God It’s Friday™ Frankenfood anyway! There’s a dumpster buffet out back that’s free and just as good. No forehead scan required.

Ben Bartee, author of Broken English Teacher: Notes From Exile, is an independent Bangkok-based American journalist with opposable thumbs.

Follow his stuff via Substack. Also, keep tabs via Twitter and Locals.

For hip Armageddon Prose t-shirts, hats, etc., peruse the merch store.

Support always welcome via insta-tip jar.

Contact Your Elected Officials
Ben Bartee
Ben Barteehttps://armageddonprose.substack.com/
BEWARE!!! Ben Bartee never minces words, so read at your own risk. Ben is a Bangkok-based American journalist, grant writer, political essayist, researcher, travel blogger, and amateur philosopher -- with opposable thumbs. He is the author of Broken English Teacher: Notes From Exile.

They Do Exist!

We are a nation of immigrants and a nation of laws; ignoring one for the other is compassionate to the point of death.

Funding Dissent: Smash for Cash – A Breakdown of Manufactured Outrage in Modern America

Today a disturbing trend has emerged. Protests are no longer always organic expressions of public will, but staged performances.

 DOGE RIP: Full of Sound and Fury but Accomplishing Nothing

DOGE’s disbanding is irrelevant; its wrecking-ball reform approach failed. It should have learned from Clinton’s Reinventing Government and worked with Congress.

The Dismal Failure of Multiple Choice Testing

Multiple-choice tests undermine true mastery; real competence is proven through written problem-solving, not guessing, leading to flawed student assessment.

Is Actor Tom Hanks In Trouble?

For years rumors of actor Tom Hank visiting Epstein’s tropical Little Saint James Island were sex acts with minor children allegedly took place.

Education Dept Says It Prevented $1 Billion in Student Aid Fraud After Reinstating Safeguards

DOE has blocked over $1B in student aid fraud this year, stopping scams where fraudsters posed as students to steal taxpayer-funded aid.

US Trade Deficit Unexpectedly Falls to 5-Year Low as Exports Surge

Trump’s tariffs helped reduce the U.S. trade deficit, bringing it to its lowest monthly level in over five years, new federal data shows.

Officials Give New Details on $700 Million Google Settlement

Google has agreed to pay out a $700 million settlement to people who paid to download apps through the Google Play Store.

Trump Admin Approves 6 States to Restrict Food Stamps

Six more states are able to restrict food stamps starting in 2026, federal officials announced on Dec. 10.

Trade Chief Jamieson Greer Indicates Progress on US–India Trade Deal

U.S. Trade Representative Jamieson Greer hinted that the United States and India are making progress on a deal.

Trump Touts Lower Prices, Bigger Paychecks in 1st Stop of National Tour

President Trump told an energetic crowd at a Dec. 9 rally that his administration’s policies are lowering the cost of living nationwide.

Trump Announces $12 Billion Farm Aid Program

Trump made the announcement at a roundtable at the White House to discuss his economic aid package for American farmers.

Alina Habba Resigns as Acting US Attorney for New Jersey

Acting U.S. Attorney Alina Habba resigned Monday after a federal appeals court ruled she had been serving in the position unlawfully.
spot_img

Related Articles

Popular Categories

MAGA Business Central