After Two-Year Exodus, Mr. Potato Head Makes Ignominious Return to CNN

5Mind. The Meme Platform

Look at what pasty flesh-blob the cat dragged in.

He was always a CNN basic bitch at heart; he’s just coming home now.

Via Variety (emphasis added):

“In an email to subscribers of CNN’s “Reliable Sources” media newsletter, Stelter said he will be returning as the lead author of the publication he founded in 2015. He said he will relaunch the newsletter on Sept. 9. In addition, Stelter will make on-air appearances on CNN as a commentator and create “digital content.”

Under CNN’s previous leadership regime, the news network parted ways with Stelter after cancelling the TV show (also called “Reliable Sources”) in 2022. Stelter returns to pick up the mantle of “Reliable Sources” newsletter after the exit last month of Oliver Darcy, who had come aboard to work on the newsletter and was assigned to keep the newsletter moving…

“But this is not going to be a ‘Back to the Future’ remake,” Stelter wrote in the email Tuesday. “The media industry has matured, CNN has evolved, and I have changed a lot since I signed off two years ago. I loved my old life as the anchor of a Sunday morning show but, to borrow some lingo from my video game blogger days, I finished that level of the game. Time for new levels, new challenges.”

Stelter said he’s returning to CNN in a new role as chief media analyst, “which means I’ll be appearing on air, developing digital content, and helming this newsletter. It will be different, because I am different.””

Spoiler alert: It won’t be different.

Whether Stelter is in at CNN or floating around somewhere in the ether grasping for relevance — it doesn’t really matter. 

I’ll be honest; the entire reason I’m writing this is to justify dredging up humiliating clips of Brian Stelter for schadenfreude, an indulgence I trust you will forgive.  

Here is Michael Wolff brutally denigrating Stelter on his very own show, met with uncomfortable sociopathic fake chuckling from Stelter and not even an attempt at self-defense. It’s about as close to small penis humiliation porn as we’ll ever get on network television.

“I think the media has done a terrible job… you’re full of sanctimony. You become one of the parts of the problem with the media. You come on here and you have a monopoly on truth, you know exactly how things are supposed to be done, you are one of the reasons people can’t stand the media. It’s your fault…”

Don’t talk to much. Listen more. People have genuine problems with the media… the media doesn’t get the story right… You’re incredibly repetitive… week after week…. There’s a problem here. Figuring out what is real is not so easy. And most people don’t want to turn to Brian Stelter to tell us what’s real.”

Here is Stelter pretending to not understand or actually not understanding — which is worse? — how the profit motive for corporate state media works, claiming that network executives don’t care about ratings.

Have some Infometal.

Ben Bartee is an independent Bangkok-based American journalist with opposable thumbs.

Follow his stuff via Substack. Also, keep tabs via Twitter.

For hip Armageddon Prose t-shirts, hats, etc., peruse the merch store.

Support always welcome via the digital tip jar.

Bitcoin public address: bc1qvq4hgnx3eu09e0m2kk5uanxnm8ljfmpefwhawv

Contact Your Elected Officials
Ben Bartee
Ben Barteehttps://armageddonprose.substack.com/
BEWARE!!! Ben Bartee never minces words, so read at your own risk. Ben is a Bangkok-based American journalist, grant writer, political essayist, researcher, travel blogger, and amateur philosopher -- with opposable thumbs. He is the author of Broken English Teacher: Notes From Exile.

Japan to Be Culturally Enriched With 300,000 Bangladeshi Migrants

Bangladesh government has intensified preparations to send huge numbers of skilled manpower to Japan under the Specified Skilled Worker (SSW) category.

Bullets and Ballrooms

At the WHPA Correspondents Dinner, there were bullets, not pointed words, sarcastic comments, overcooked chicken, or bad jokes being dodged.

Anti-MAHA Senator Bill Cassidy in Existential Primary Fight After Squashing Trump Surgeon General Nominee

President Trump pulled the plug on his nominee for surgeon general, but he’s using the setback to help secure a win he covets: the defeat Sen. Bill Cassidy.

The Proposed Trans-Caspian Pipeline Is Shaping Up To Be A Flashpoint

The strategic stakes rise as NATO edges into Russia’s southern periphery via TRIPP, while Turkiye pushes the Trans-Caspian Pipeline Russia opposes.

America’s Best Governor is Ron DeSantis

No Governor has done a better job than Ron DeSantis in Florida. His state is growing, luring people fleeing high-tax states such as New York.

World Bank Warns Oil Demand Destruction Is Spreading Globally Amid Strait of Hormuz Disruptions

World Bank warns Strait of Hormuz disruptions and Middle East conflict are causing a global oil shock suppressing energy demand globally this year.

Virginia Supreme Court Strikes Down New Congressional Map That Favors Democrats

The Virginia Supreme Court struck down a voter-approved congressional redistricting map after ruling the Democratic-controlled Legislature failed to follow required constitutional procedures.

Department of War Begins UFO Files Release

The Department of War released its first batch of UFO-related documents that had been slated for public release.

DOJ Reaches Settlement With Data Firm Over Meat Industry Competition Concerns

DOJ proposed a settlement requiring Agri Stats to stop sharing sensitive data among major U.S. meat processors to protect competition.

Rubio Meets With Pope Leo at the Vatican

Secreetary of State Marco Rubio met with Pope Leo XIV at the Vatican, amid a war of words between the head of the Catholic Church and President Trump.

CBP Says It Will Start Issuing First Refunds of Trump Tariffs on May 12

CBP said the first batch of refunds from tariffs imposed by President Trump, which the Supreme Court struck down in February, would begin on May 12.

Trump Says US Economy Is Booming Despite Iran War

President Trump touted his economic policies, from tax cuts and tariffs to deregulation, saying the US is thriving despite conflict in the Middle East.

US to Cut Troops in Germany a ‘Lot Further’ Than 5,000: Trump

President Trump said the U.S. will withdraw more troops from Germany amid disputes with Berlin over the Iran war.
spot_img

Related Articles

Popular Categories

MAGA Business Central