It’s all Mary Wollstonecraft’s fault, I suppose. (After all, she is called the “Mother of all Feminists”.) Or maybe it’s the fault of women everywhere. I’m not sure. But chivalry—those courtesies performed by men for women—has gone out the door. It needs to come back, especially because of the current trend of the blur between the two sexes. That blur is only worsened by the absence of courtesies that help men to be men, and encourage women to be women.
I’ve seen women holding doors open for men. I’ve also seen men shooting through department store entrances, banging doors closed on the very noses of the women behind them. I’ve seen a man run across a busy city street, leaving behind his wife to fend for herself. I’ve seen a woman struggling to carry a heavy grocery load as a young man with wasted muscle sauntered across the parking lot, not bothering to help.
Watch any old film and you will see an odd phenomenon that is now (nearly) as extinct as the dinosaurs: chivalry. How did it work? A man opened doors for a woman, helped her in and out of the car, and helped her with her coat. He addressed her properly, as “Miss” or “Mrs.” He stood when she entered the room; he offered her a seat. He carried her awkward and heavy loads, he took her arm to guide her through crowds, he removed his hat in her presence. All this was done simply to honor her for being a woman, no matter what her status.
in the 1940 film “Flight Command”.
In the wonderful World of Online, the public’s reactions to chivalry are quite interesting. “Yes, we women do appreciate it, and the little things do count”, declares StyleCaster.com. On the same note, another site says: “A man should open the door for a woman because it shows respect. It is a sign of respect that he has for her, and it means that he acknowledges her as his equal. This is something that all men should do, regardless of whether they are married to women or not.” In a Today poll, over 90% of those asked agreed that opening a door for a woman is a chivalrous act and that women love it; about 10% disagreed.
Meanwhile, some people whine that because of “equal rights”, women shouldn’t accept or even want to receive such gestures from a man. According to an article called “No, Chivalry is Not Dead, But it’s About Time it Was”:
Psychologists refer to the paternalistic attitudes underlying these behaviours [i.e., chivalry] as benevolent sexism. Benevolent sexism involves the belief that men should cherish and protect women, and ‘put them on a pedestal’. This is because women are viewed as being more morally pure, weaker, and in need of protection. . . . [However] one experiment found exposure to benevolently sexist comments led women to perform worse on a cognitive task, and to be more likely to think of themselves as incompetent. A more recent experiment found benevolently sexist feedback led to women displaying cardiovascular responses similar to experiencing threat.
Similarly, The Washington Post suggests that men holding doors open for women is “perhaps [an] antiquated custom.” Still other women gripe that chivalry gives them the unwanted feeling of being a “damsel in distress”.
In this author’s opinion, these latter views are nonsensical gibberish.
But it is also partially the fault of women—at least of that certain group called feminists—that chivalry has literally vanished. These trailblazing females have discredited the traditional role of women as proper ladies, housewives, and mothers. The feminist movement rebukes chivalry and demands that all women be treated as Calamity Janes.
Although the feminists asked for this, other women—probably most women—certainly didn’t. I’m sure many women join me as I entreat the men: Please know that we want chivalry back. We want to be treated like ladies again. I’d like to add that we women do not think of chivalry as either “unmanly” or “old-timey”. And we women should courteously accept such gestures.
